Every word matters

This past weekend was the fifth weekend of my NLP training. Again, it was a very interesting weekend with interesting insights. Good insights this time, not like the last time 🙂 .

On Saturday, we started the morning with a chance to tell about our experiences over the past month. There were some people with amazing stories about how they changed their behavior and as a result got a great opportunity. I felt intimidated, I’m just struggling to be me and make it through the day.
But then someone else got up and told us she had this same feeling, but that she wanted to recognize the steps that she made and that these were important as well. I’m so grateful that she did. Because of her, I realized that it’s not important whether my steps are “big” or “small”, hell, they’re only “big” or “small” because I define them like that. So, I’m gonna stick with steps and I want to recognize the steps that I made. I want to be aware that I made these steps even though it wasn’t always easy and I want to thank myself for doing that and tell myself I did a good job.

Have you ever noticed how a lot of people treat themselves not nearly as kind as than they would treat a friend? I used to say things to myself I would never ever say to a friend. But why be kind and loving to a friend, and not to yourself? That doesn’t make sense. So, I’ve decided to treat myself as I would treat a friend. And if a friend would have made these steps, I would be proud of her and tell her she did a great job. So, instead of telling myself I did almost nothing and what I did is so unimportant, I tell myself I made some great steps and that I’m proud of myself.

So, that morning I got up and stood in front of the group and told them about me, realizing I was depressed again, about the steps I took and how I decided to acknowledge my steps and be proud of myself. I was so proud of myself that I did that and I got some really heart warming responses.
Being open to other people has made a big difference for me. It’s still not always easy yet, but I’m getting there.

This weekend was all about Language and Behavior patterns and how every word counts. If you thinks about it, that makes sense, but how often do you really think about what you’re saying to yourself and others? At least it made me realize that I need to speak to myself as I would to my best friend, that will make life a whole lot easier for me. And for you?
Remember, every word matters.

Comments

Comment by Marjolein on 2015-02-27 13:26:26 -0700

Well said! And such an important realisation. I recognize that little nagging voice inside your head criticizing anything it can. And also how supportive and caring I am to my friends. Time to be my own best friend…

Comment by Nikki @ Growing Up Mom on 2015-02-27 15:27:06 -0700

Thank you for sharing so much of yourself Sandra, you are opening up and I think that is a huge step. I love hearing from you, and your amazing journey. I agree that we do tend to be harder on ourselves than on others. A lot of times we forget to give ourselves grace, and we need to more than we know. So give yourself grace every day, because you deserve it. Thank you again Sandra.